A 45-year-old fat man trying to find his inner skinny dude.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Can't Help It

I know I haven't written much lately, and if you're waiting to read this blog, I apologize.  There's been a lot going on.

First, in the last month, I have gone to the hospital every day because my wife or kids or all three have been there.  The kids are still there and will be for a few weeks.  Nothing is wrong with them except that they are young.  Once they learn to eat and breathe at the same time, they'll come home.

This is the first time in a year that I've really fallen off the weightloss wagon.  Despite the fact that the hospital is only ten minutes from my house, I have felt serious time pressure, and I've needed to rely on convenience foods.  Specifically doughnut.  There are something like ten doughnut shops between my house and the hospital.  I feel as if the proprietors all know me.  In fact, one gave me an extra doughnut the other day because I've been such a good customer.  That was the bump I needed, I think.  I mean, I could have been going to the Subway next door.  Right?  Right?  Do I hear an amen?

Who knew doughnuts were a trigger food for me?  Sometimes people bring them to the office, and I have been quite good at ignoring them.  Well, not ignoring them.  I look at them, and then I decide I don't want them.  It's food porn. 

I turned 45 yesterday.  I would like to lose another 40-50 pounds this year (he says, breakfasting on birthday cake).  I owe it to myself and to my new babies, who have no visible means of support.  (Don't they come with a dowry?  Oh wait--)  I have put on 3-4 pounds in the last month.  It's the stress.  The eating of feelings.  I think, however, I'm over it, for a while anyway.  Another year would be good.  All told, it's not horrible, and I am smaller than I was a year ago at this time.  I don't even notice the 3-4 pounds except on the scale.  But the trend is not what I want.

I think I'm rambling now.  Here's a nice picture.


  1. They are so adorable!

    Man, you must be worn out. And your wife too :) if it was her blog I'd be commiserating with her.

    Just don't get mad at yourself when you break under stress, don't hate yourself. It will be easier to get back on track if you're feeling good about yourself.

    Subway has breakfast now...

  2. Darling babies, and what gingersnapper said. Be as kind to yourself as you'd be to me, or your mom, or your brother, or your best friend.

    We have triplet grandsons who are now three. Believe me, you have so much JOY to look forward to!

  3. I thank you both. I think I'm stabilized, and I've been back to the gym. So far so good. It's been a big year. I'm going to do the work and not judge myself too harshly. I appreciate the reminder.

    My wife is pretty wiped out, but she's a rock star. She's going to be a good mom.

    The girls have charmed me already. They don't do much, but it's all fascinating.

    Who knew I'd have newborns at 45!

  4. A prediction: Those cute girls will never know you were overweight, except from pics you leave lying around.

  5. Oh Tan--from your mouth to God's ear!